Cycling: 4362 miles (209,956 ft of ascent!)
Running: 331 miles (basically stopped for a few months due to a knee injury)
Swimming: 264,169 yards
1975 - the year of my birth, the year of the Rabbit. I am a rabbit - I avoid confrontation and conflict, I enjoy routine and safety. Rabbits do not cope well with change or drama. Breast cancer brought both.
2022 started off well - one year cancer free, working on breast cancer advocacy. I went hours at a time - sometimes even a day - without thinking about breast cancer.
Sadly, the universe decided not to stop at breast cancer in giving me yet more change and drama. Since October, my professional life has been in upheaval, and I am facing so much loss - career, retirement plans, health insurance, maybe even my home...all while being in one of the darkest places of my life mentally. The last 3 months have been as difficult as anything breast cancer threw my way - maybe even worse. Cancer never made me want to crawl in a hole and not come out - quite the opposite: I wanted to leap out of whatever holes I was stuck in and start really living.
Cancer made me sign up for Ironman Alaska, and cancer is what makes me exercise like it's a prescription for medicine. I did pretty well this year for a post-menopausal, osteoporotic, double mastectomy 47 year old - until my anxiety and depression derailed my exercise. I went weeks without swimming. I didn't sign up for any races, and wondered if I ever would. The numbers above then really reflect everything until October - since then, other than daily yoga, even exercise has failed to bring me joy.
Well, I have no choice but to leave the safety of my rabbit hole, and start living. The kick in the ass I need to make change is going to really hurt for a while, but I hope it's only to find a bigger, better, safer rabbit hole.
